Funny pics

Discussion in 'Lounge' started by Barstewardsquad, Apr 29, 2019.

  1. Black & White

    Black & White Well-Known Member

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    Something special.jpg
     
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  2. Lozzy

    Lozzy God Like

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    IMG-20220613-WA0006.jpg
     
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  3. bazzashadow

    bazzashadow Elite Member

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    C32330A1-97A9-4981-8966-CB1D676EFA7F.jpeg
     
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  4. Boothman

    Boothman Elite Member

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    UK RAISES ALERT LEVEL
    The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent Russian threats and have therefore raised their security level from “Miffed” to “Peeved.” Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to “Irritated” or even “A Bit Cross.” The English have not been “A Bit Cross” since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out. The Russians have been re-categorized from “Tiresome” to “A Bloody Nuisance.” The last time the British issued a “Bloody Nuisance” warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.

    The Scots have raised their threat level from “Pissed Off” to “Let’s Get the Bastards.” They don’t have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years.

    The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from “Run” to “Hide.” The only two higher levels in France are “Collaborate” and “Surrender.” The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France’s white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country’s military capability.

    Italy has increased the alert level from “Shout Loudly and Excitedly” to “Elaborate Military Posturing.” Two more levels remain: “Ineffective Combat Operations” and “Change Sides.”

    The Germans have increased their alert state from “Disdainful Arrogance” to “Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs.” They also have two higher levels: “Invade a Neighbour” and “Lose.”

    Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.

    The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

    Australia, meanwhile, has raised its security level from “No worries” to “She’ll be alright, Mate.” Two more escalation levels remain: “Crikey! I think we’ll need to cancel the barbie this weekend!” and “The barbie is cancelled.” So far, no situation has ever warranted use of the final escalation level.

    credit John Cleese
     
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  5. Blade runner 1

    Blade runner 1 Elite Member

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    604C9BA7-AACA-44F8-8D2C-1B2A3A36B91D.jpeg
     
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  6. Barstewardsquad

    Barstewardsquad God Like

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    signal-2022-06-13-21-29-05-429.jpg
     
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  7. bazzashadow

    bazzashadow Elite Member

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    19D33447-37A6-4CEE-AF4C-155E23C93C02.jpeg
     
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  8. Muffking

    Muffking God Like

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    [​IMG]
     
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  9. Boothman

    Boothman Elite Member

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    upload_2022-6-15_10-13-5.jpeg
     
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  10. Black & White

    Black & White Well-Known Member

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    Chat up line:-
    "You remind me of my little toe."
    "Why, because I'm cute & petite?"
    "No, it's because I'll probably bang you on a table later when I'm pissed!"
     
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  11. Lozzy

    Lozzy God Like

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    Screenshot_20220615-172216_Chrome.jpg
     
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  12. T.C

    T.C Elite Member

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    [​IMG]
     
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  13. NS400R

    NS400R Elite Member

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    upload_2022-6-15_20-43-38.png
     
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  14. NS400R

    NS400R Elite Member

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    upload_2022-6-16_9-46-26.png
    m
     
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  15. NS400R

    NS400R Elite Member

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    upload_2022-6-16_13-10-3.png
     
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  16. Black & White

    Black & White Well-Known Member

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    The ones on the right, when dried out, are colloquially known as 'Porn crackers'!
    There, that might get some laffs now it makes sense.
     
    #6096 Black & White, Jun 16, 2022
    Last edited: Jun 16, 2022
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  17. Coda

    Coda Active Member

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    Either I misunderstand, or you don't know your left from your right :p:D
     
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  18. NS400R

    NS400R Elite Member

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    It’s his eyesight that’s failing ;)
     
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  19. Black & White

    Black & White Well-Known Member

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    You got me there. Had my shoes on the wrong feet all day!
    I'll do an edit to cover up my incompetence!
     
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  20. Lozzy

    Lozzy God Like

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    IMG-20220616-WA0011.jpg
     
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