My son pointed out that the weather has been rubbish since I got my bike back. I thought he was about to offer me some sympathy. His next words? 'I reckon you've broken the weather, dad.' Nice.
It's getting very close to spoiling the British super bikes at Brands which would be a shame for all .Just opened the garage tonight plugged the charger in again ,and shut the door that's it for this week and the roads are white yet again.
Oi, sunshine [irony]! You're the weather Jonah! This is ridiculous. Not even my family believe me. Even the dog is wary of coming out with me.
You're too tall Alex, you're like a lightening rod for crap. Glitch ( The biker god) looks across a crowd of people, sees your barnet poking above the rest and says "You'll do."
This is what you do. You take your son's pocket money (that'll teach him) and you buy a new laptop. You donate this laptop to a member called Blaggers, so he can get back online. Once he's back all the bad juju will fall off you like a turd from the arse of a very tall cow. Trust me. I've got a BSc...
No way, bro! That laptop money goes towards the Dymag fund. Tell him to use a mobile. Lazy beggar. I hope the BSE clears up soon.
On your own head be it. You see, before you became a part of this rag tag army of illiterati there was a strange shadowy figure who roamed the bowels of 1000rr.co.uk who answered to the name of Blaggers. Nobody knew where he came from, but most people thought it was Yorkshire. Nobody knew who he was, although some say he was the ghost of King Cnut. All everbody agreed about him was that if it wasn't for bad luck, he wouldn't have any luck at all. Everything he touched, tasted, sniffed or looked at turned to crap. He was Midas in reverse. Quite frankly, he wouldn't get a poke in a fire. He was, to us, a talisman. At the very least, we took solace from the fact that no matter how bad life seemed for the rest of us, all we had to do was sit with the noose around our necks and wait for his next post. Then, once the echo of the swearing had died away after telling us about his divorce, accident, ceiling collapsing or which ever force of nature had conspired to feck up his constant, unremitting optimism, life just didn't seem so bad after all. Then, one night just after Christmas of last year, his computer died ( probably exploding and taking out the plasma at the same time) and we haven't heard from him since. Chances are, being a sparks by trade he is even now hanging, dessicated and crispy like a year old bogie from a light fitting in Doncaster. All we do know is, his presence was a magnet for bad juju, bending bad vibes from the rest of us and sucking them into his being for our protection, and now, without that protection we are susceptible to all the crap normally headed his way. Some say, once he gets his hands on another computer he'll return, to protect us once more. Others say he'd just drop it on his foot. So, don't disparage sacrifice to the memory of Blaggers, shanks. He's still out there, somewhere, probably A&E. BLAGGERS 03-01-2012 ~ 27-12-2012 Missing. Presumed Concussed
I don't know what to say, Ken. I take it all back. The man is a legend. Maybe he's moved to Bergen, or Lourdes?
No. Actually he just tagged me in Facebook. I didn't want to say as it would have ballsed up the whole epic mystique I'd just woven around him. Twat.
